We all, as parents, intentionally scold our children or be harsh to them whenever they do not behave themselves. However, this is done with a good intention. Perhaps, to make children feel guilty or to instill fear of punishment when they do anything wrong. This is, undoubtedly, a good way of passing on wisdom to the new generation but at times, it may have an exactly opposite effect. This, in turn, can create hatred in the minds of children, making them hostile and even more notorious. Therefore there are certain lines that parents should not say to their children as it may affect them mentally and deteriorate their mental health. With super active kids let’s find out what here things are:
- “You’re selfish.”
Even if all children occasionally act selfishly, saying they are by nature selfish can traumatize them for the rest of their lives. The child’s actions, not who the child is as a person, should be the focus of the parents’ disappointment, according to Loewenstein. This kind of elucidating language is crucial.
- “Wish you’d never been born.”
No matter how angry you are with your child, it is never appropriate to express your regret that they were even born. According to Koenig, “I’ve met people who were told this and were damaged by the statement for life.” Simply leave the situation until you have calmed down enough to reply in a less cruel way when you’re angry enough to say anything this harsh.
- “Why can’t you be more like your sibling?”
In many households, sibling rivalry is a normal part of growing up, but it is always harmful when parents intentionally encourage it. According to psychotherapist Shirley Porter, RSW, author of Choosing Therapy, “This may make a kid think they are not good enough at their core, and that who they are, is faulty in some manner. It can also lead to conflict with the sibling you’re putting on a pedestal.”
- “You’re stupid.”
Never tell your kids they’re stupid unless you want to ruin your connection with them forever. The hurt can persist for many years, despite the fact that you might be repeating it in fits of rage or irritation, according to Porter. It may cause a child’s fundamental self-perceptions to change negatively.
- “Stop crying.”
Ever had someone tell you to stop crying? Did it ever succeed? According to clinical psychologist Danielle Harris, PsyD, LMFT, “It might be confusing to them to hear that what they are experiencing isn’t acceptable with you, and it can also make them less likely to want to come to tell you how they are feeling in the future if they are suffering with something.” These are just a few of many things we end up saying to our children while being mad at them but what we actually forget is everything we do or say to them shapes their mind and personality. Hence, as parents you should take care not to say the above mentioned 5 things.
For more useful information like this, visit superactivekids.com regularly and build a better relationship with your children.